The Brown Stuff

It takes quite a bit to get me interested in politics, but I can't tell you how much I'm loving all this Gordon Brown fucking-it-up stuff.

I've always looked upon politics as a sinister, lethal microcosm of the showbiz world. With politicians you have vainglorious, narcissistic liars playing with people's lives and the wealth of nations, as opposed to celebrities simply greasing their careers, banks balances and general emptiness.

I'm always getting asked what a certain celebrity is really like after I have interviewed them. Naturally, many are insecure, self-obsessed egomaniacs with incurable delusional syndrome, but in general they are decent enough folk. It's the people around them you've got to watch.

The agents and managers are the worst. These are the ones in the middle, milking it, scheming, shafting everyone, playing a double game, sucking up to their "talents" while all they care about is their 20%.

This is why I'm loving the Brown comeuppance that he is receiving square on the nose from the media and the country. Brown richly deserves this, for all his Machiavellian, super snide tendencies that have finally been exposed. If he has any metal, this should make him a more honest man and a better leader. I won't hold my breath.

But it is the people behind him that I can't help thinking about, indeed chuckling at. Imagine the bollockings from Brown - "But YOU told me to do this, you little git?". Think of all the sycophants who have been telling their Emperor how wonderfully dressed he is since his faux coronation, how must they be feeling now? Deeply rattled, for sure, and maybe - but very unlikely - just a little bit ashamed.

They have all been caught out - big time. It's a bit like suddenly being back at school and seeing a coterie of teacher's oily pets finally getting caught cheating in tests and getting royally bollocked in front of assembly. Wonderful. If only it wasn't all so serious when it comes to politics.