Congratulations to Barack Obama, a worthy winner of the Democrat nomination in the US presidential election - which he will lose to the man with the G-force face (botox, or tuck?).
Obama is a gust of much-needed fresh air in a country gasping for life beneath the bloodied stench created by Bush. He'd get my vote.
Every newspaper and media organisation around the world today proclaim Obama as "the first black presidential nominee". Have I missed something? Or am I colour blind?
Obama's dad is black. His mum is white. He is mixed race, or whatever other politically correct term you prefer to use - except, of course, that shocking pre-1990s gaff "half caste".
So, rock star Obama is as much white as he is black, yet the world is in thrall of his black 50%, while ignoring his white heritage. Imagine if it was the other way round. I suspect there would be hell to pay. And would the world's media rejoice in the same way if, say, a white looking politician - of an even 50-50 mixed background - suddenly ascended to rule an African country? I doubt it.
So, isn't this all a bit of medium-rare inverted racism? Or am I only thinking this cuz I'm white?
It makes no odds anyway: a bloke like me - a "whitey" as Obama's wife likes to call us on the sly - can't play the race card. To the world and its media, racism is only ever dealt one way. And it ain't to white people, innit.
Obama has always deftly avoided the race issue, but maybe he should take a leaf out of Tiger Woods's book. When the media was reaching for the cliche tin and trying to label him the first black golfing legend, he flicked it back with a swoop of his driver and intellect. He said he is not in fact black, but is proud to be mixed race: part black, part Thai, plus a watered down percentage of other races from his bloodline. In fact, Woods revealed to Oprah Winfrey that he had his own classification - "Cablinasian", as in Caucasian-black-Indian-Asian. A stroke of stunning and admirable individuality.
I'll come back to you when I have thought of a name that might suit the politically correct world of Barack Obama.
Ps: Just a thought - if Obama becomes President, will he make his mark and decorate his new home...so he can live in the Black House? Relax, it's a joke. Call it a bit of black humour.
